Ever since my vertigo attack two weeks ago, I have been very conscious about the state of my health. Worried about the next attack, I find myself staring and focusing on the view in front of me, making sure it is not turning or spinning.
Aware of the fragility of myself, I ask myself, "What if I have a stroke, or another vertigo attack?" If it is a stroke, I hope it will kill me instantly rather then leave me paralysed. If another vertigo attack, I will need to find shelter somewhere to let the effect pass off and put my head down. Preferably at home. That is why I now worry about going out for a period of time alone.
The recent attack alarmed both my wife and my son. It was the first time that my wife saw the agony of the attack. Previously she only heard about it after the attack and not concerned at all. My son saw the aftermath of it and the way the doctor treated me and warning of the sinister side of it all.
Got home from church yesterday morning, to find all my clothes in the wardrobe, thrown on my bed. Shocked, I was about to blow my top, when my wife told me that she will rearrange all my things for me. After counting up to ten, I decided to give in. I realised I have many new socks, underwear and shirts still wrapped up. The last time somebody tidied up my room was when I was in the Air Force. It was either my English Batman in England or my Batgirl in K.L. My wife never bothered about me for more than forty years. Now she has decided to intervene. What to do? I have my way of hanging up my ten trousers to wear over two weeks, and I can tell what day of the week, by looking at my trousers.
I suppose my wife must have realised that this 'dead-meat' is still alive and kicking. Better show some concern before he kicks the bucket. I have always been a lone wolf, not bothering anybody, and falling sick and recovering without anyone knowing it. We practically led separate lives. I like to be independant and not having to argue over what I want to do. Some people find me strange, but I find solace and comfort in myself, because I do not like 'kaypohs' telling me what to do.
Till then....
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2 comments:
Hi Paul good to see you lately.
Will pray to our lady that she will bless you with many more happy and healthy years.
Always have a positive thought. Tell yourself that you be fine everyday. Don't worry of having an attack. Maybe if you do you'll have one so be POSITIVE. Thanks
Take care my friend.
PS I have some photos of Archbishop Chan from Ipoh (aunty Lip) will send you a copy maybe you'll recognise some of them.
Thank you Pat. We must meet up.
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