You want to retire?

In the news lately is about retirement and in today's papers, there are news about people still working until their 80's & 90's. Friends have often asked me what it is to retire. They have the lofty notion of sitting back doing nothing, and away from the 9 - 5 routine (though nowadays it is very much beyond 5).

I wince every time someone asks me this.

This is now my 12th year of retirement. Seems how time flies. It was not my intention to retire, but I was forced into it. My world fell apart when I was told to retire. Not much of a golden hand shake as well, in monetary terms. To add insult to injury, I was taxed of my hard earned gratuity, just because some tycoon got away with a multi-million dollar hand shake setting a precedent.

I was offered a position by a Japanese company, who even went out of the way, to show me my new office on an offshore island. The next meeting was to discuss my remuneration. Suddenly, everything went quiet. I finally called up my friend who had arranged all this, and he was embarrassed to tell me that Tokyo head office had turned me down because of my age.

Disappointed by this, I began to apply for other job vacancies. No success, only one company replied saying the position had been filled. Turned down because of my age! How depressing.

Resigned to my fate, I then immersed myself into church work. I worked diligently and drew a lot of accolade from the Priests and people in church. It was very spiritually satisfying and I enjoyed the work. Unfortunately, church politics dampened my spirit somewhat, and I have now scaled down my involvement.

Retirement is not a bed of roses. Like I mentioned in my first blog posting, I am worried whether I will outlive my savings or my savings will outlive me. My life style is one of frugality, and even lower self esteem. Money spent is money gone and there are still so many bills to pay trying to stretch the dollar. I have spent many sleepless nights trying to figure out my finances. It is okay if I have a lot of money but I do not. So money is a big concern.

I have never been so close to my wife physically until my retirement. I mope around the house trying to do my own things. I am the automatic dish washer in the kitchen. Periodically, I sling my bag and take the bus out and browsed around the city sometimes aimlessly, sometimes looking for something or other. Even meeting up with friends is a good diversion. Without adequate funds, it is merely window shopping. After that it is home by bus, avoiding the evening rush and also before four and having to pay full bus fare. Home to face the wife again. I envy those couples who can get along with each other and going in and out together. I have resigned to being alone most of the time. Not good being lonely, but then I have no one to disagree with. Life can be funny at times. A paradox.

To be unemployed and not earning any money is a terrible thing. To have to pay bills on top of that is a nightmare. So to those who asked me about retirement, can you afford not to work and yet support yourself and spouse (with or without)? Are you sane enough to face your spouse every waking hour day and night? Can you and your spouse get along? Think about that.

True that you have the time to do the many things, that you long to do when you are working. If you can maintain the quality of life style that you are accustomed to, well and good. But if you cannot, sacrifices have to be made. As for me, I cannot say that I am absolutely happy with the way things are. I still nurse my depressions and anxieties. I am blessed by the Lord with what I am and I am grateful for that. I will continue to seek solace by trying to be a good Catholic.

Three important things you must consider seriously:

1. Have you a nest egg you can fall back on to sustain your life style? Money may be the root of all evil, but money pays for your food and bills. You cannot rely on anyone, even your children, for money. They also have their own bills to pay. You must be financially independent. Good if you receive some money from the children. Consider that as a bonus. Early financial planning for your retirement is essential.

2. Do you get along with your spouse? Good if you do but disastrous if you do not. You are going to face each other day in, day out. You begin to notice certain traits of your spouse that you did not notice before. That can be very irritating. Not married? Good for you. Keep your current friends and single out those you find agreeable. Loneliness is a terrible thing to live with. You may have a large family, but they are not with you all the time, because they have their own lives to live too. Do something to keep your mind occupied. I have my computer, photography and church work. Since my wife have no interest in any of those, that will keep me away from her. Important to keep your mind working all the time.

3. Be religious. You must be spiritual for the last and final lap in your life. If you have not been attending church regularly, it is still not too late to make amends. You are the lost sheep that our Lord will be very happy to welcome you back. Do charity or church work. It will stabilise you spiritually to prepare you for that final moment when you leave this troubled world. Make up for all your past sins. Not a Christian? Convert. It is not too late. Other religion will have their own teachings and doctrines too. Find yourself and God.

I hope anyone reading this post will learn from my mistakes and I hope I have given you, my dear readers, something to think about.



Till then....